Doulas & Why they are Important! – Guest Post

Catherine Catherall is a Doula who is also a surrogate. She is very experienced as a birth doula and I requested her to write up a guest about Doulas, what they do and why they play such an important role in birth. Please enjoy her insight.

“At the beginning of July my son was in a motorcycle accident. We were taken to see him in the trauma room. Now I have been in our local emergency room a few times with my children over the years. Our last visit there was for a bead up our littlest ones nose. It was no big deal. They explained to use what they were going to do and it was all smooth sailing. For my sons motorcycle accident I felt so incredibly lost and scared. I have not been in a trauma room with anything major before this. There was lots going on and people coming and going using words I didn’t know. I was scared. Then a nurse I know walked in. I burst into tears! Why? Because she was a familiar face to me. As soon as I saw her I felt incredible relief! I knew things were going to be ok. Was she actually going to make things okay? Heck no. But seeing a face in the crowds that I knew and trusted meant so much to me and calmed me right down. I got thinking about that later after all the dust settled. Just by SEEING someone I know, I felt better. She didn’t explain anything to me, she didn’t even stay the whole time. But she did give me a hug, which no one else had done. And I wouldn’t expect nurses to go around randomly hugging people. (though it might be nice!). I would have paid for someone I knew to be right there beside me explaining what is going on. Truly. A trauma doula if you will.

It made me realize that doulas are actually MORE important then I even realized! Usually birth is somewhat predictable. But sometimes things go sideways and the staff do not explain what is going on because they’re busy doing things. As a doula I always ask if the partner understands what is going on. Often if things happen quickly they get scared and maybe don’t even know what questions to ask! That is where I can help. I can usually explain who the people are, who is coming in the room (NICU staff, obstetricians, etc) so at least they know who is in the room. And because I have attended just about 100 births, I can also explain quite often what is going on and help them to ask questions if they need clarification on anything. Having that familiar face in the room can be so reassuring!

So who hires a doula? I have doula-ed for first time moms, fourth time moms, home births, planned cesareans, those who have chosen adoption for their baby, surrogates and many other scenarios. Often the partner is not totally on board for having a doula. I mean why can’t they be the doula? Well I will tell you why. Dads/partners are amazing people! There is no doubt about it but how many of them have been to a birth before? Not many. A doula can explain that when the birthing person says “I am done! I am going home!”, she doesn’t actually want to go home… she is probably in transition and that is a good thing! I often send the partner to rest or get some food if the labour is longer. If there is no partner I can be that sole support to the mom and help her with comfort measures, changing positions and whatever else she may need. I have gone in the operating room in place of the dad a couple of times now where the dad just knew they would not do well in that situation. I have supported surrogates and made sure they were not left all alone once the baby was born and the IPs were with the baby bonding. Basically anyone who is pregnant can benefit from the support of a doula.

What does a doula do? That varies for sure! During pregnancy it’s providing information, getting to know my clients and how they see the birth going, supporting them during labour and delivery with comfort measures, information, things like getting water and extra pillows. Postpartum it’s helping with breastfeeding, helping with local resources, answering questions, etc. There is evidence based information on doulas being a part of someone’s birth team for sure! One dad told me “You don’t know how much you need a doula, until after”. Once you actually experience what we can do to help, then you get it. So if you are expecting or planning a pregnancy, look into doulas!”

“Christine Catherall is a birth doula, postpartum doula, childbirth educator, infant sleep educator, Evidence Based Birth instructor and owner of Central Alberta Doulas. She has been supporting families in Red Deer and Central Alberta since 2012. You can find her on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/CentralAlbertaDoulas/ and her website is www.Centralalbertadoulas.com”

The post Doulas & Why they are Important! – Guest Post appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/doulas-important-guest-post/

Retreats for our Surrogates & Egg Donors

Being a part of ANU has been so incredibly fun for me! One big perk (well, its a big perk imo) is the retreats offered for the surro’s & egg donors. Every year, there is one for the BC ladies, AB ladies & ON ladies. Typically, they’re done in the Summer. Can you imagine asking pregnant women high on hormones to go on a retreat in -30C weather? while comical maybe, not practical.

This year, the BC retreat is the weekend of Aug 11-13 being hosted in Harrison Hot Springs. It includes an essential oils class AND a meal prepared by a Masterchef Canada finalist! It sounds like so much fun to me.

The AB retreat is the weekend of Aug 25-27 and being hosted in Sylvan Lake. I know the activities being planned will include lots of laughter!

I can’t wait!

The ON retreat is still TBD.

The post Retreats for our Surrogates & Egg Donors appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/retreats-surrogates-egg-donors/

Surro Saturday! – Rylan

Its Surro Saturday again! Please enjoy this guest post that Rylan took the time to write up for us.

 

“It’s hard to pinpoint a beginning of my surrogacy journey. It may have been a book. The fictional book was written from the perspective of a woman who vowed to do something “good” each day for a year.
I loved the idea behind the story, but not the writing execution. It did inspire me. I set out a plan for my own year long social experiment. My plan was to complete 365 random acts of kindness over thr next year. They must, whenever possible, be anonymous and never include the demand or expectation for the recipient to “pay it forward”. It was to be kindness for kindness sake alone.
This social experiment is NOT why I became a surrogate. Yet, this social experiment changed and grew me in all kinds of ways I had not for seen.
When thinking of doing something for someone I no longer considered personal gain. The idea that I was in a place to judge who was “deserving” of kindness and love fled.
So when I rediscovered surrogacy in 2015 my only thought was “I can’t imagine why not”.

Surrogacy is not a call for everyone. I am deeply grateful that I am called to it.

I met my first set of Intended Parents in the early autumn of 2015. At first their mature age was a surprise for me. I was quickly able to see that the number of trips around the sun one takes is in no way related to our hearts desires and ability to love and care for precious life.

A uterine polyp was discovered during my screening process. Routine surgery took care of it perfectly, yet did result in a more stretched out time line than we had hoped for.

Family Day of 2016 I was to board a flight to BC for our embryo transfer procedure. Considering the extremely mild winter we had been experiencing, the snow storm that hit that morning took everyone by surprise. Traffic jams at 4am, delayed flights, over booked flights, cancelled flights, missed flights. My husband and I spent 30 hours in airports trying desperately to make our appointment at the fertility clinic the following morning.
Through the sheer grace of God and the beautiful heart of an unknown, off duty flight attendant we indeed did *just* make our appointment time. It was high stress travel that still did not manage to go as planned for our return trip home.
Two weeks later, breaking the news to C and K that the cycle had failed was incredibly difficult. In all honestly though, none of us were surprised considering the stress.

In April we were able to once again fly to BC for a second embryo transfer. We hit no traffic. The flights were on time. We knew where we were going. The hotel staff were very accommodating. I felt hopeful and positive about this transfer.
And I had reason to! On Mothers day I was able to send C a photo of my blood work confirming the pregnancy!

This was my easiest pregnancy. My morning sickness was ever present, but not crippling like it was with my biological children. I gained no weight but baby kept growing perfectly (when one is married to a pastry chef she often has a few pounds she would be happy to see vanish- as is my case).

Without incessant morning sickness I had more energy this pregnancy than any before. I was able to stay on top of running a home daycare, home schooling both my children and starting up a new business venture from the ground up.

I craved green grapes. Once my husband brought me home red grapes from the grocery store, figuring grapes were grapes. Pregnancy cravings disagreed!! That mistake was not made twice

Having never been a surrogate before I did question how I would *actually* feel about handing over this tiny person to her parents after delivery. I knew how I was called to feel. I knew how I wanted to feel, but I wasn’t sure if it would work out that way.

I loved to keep C and K on top of all new developments. They delighted in new ultrasound photos, or hearing about scent aversions or my food cravings.
The depth of our relationship grew over those months. It was so fascinating to develop this completely unique relationship with people who would be complete strangers to us if I were not growing their daughter.

Due to geographical distance we did not get to meet C and K in person until a few days before my due date. They were warm and happy people who were so excited and nervous about the stage to come.

Labour finally started four days past due in the evening.
Come the morning my husband and I took our children to a family members home for care. Then off we went to the hospital.
Upon arrival I was asked to don a gown and wait to be checked. But, four days past due, baby was done with waiting. She kicked twice. The second time breaking my water. The vomiting was immediate from that point. I was moved into a delivery room and received the blessing of an epidural.
There we sat, for the next six hours, my husband and I with C and K. I was fully dialiated and ready to deliver within moments of receiving my epidural. But since the only OBGYN on staff in the hospital that day was caught up in back to back to back emergency c sections, we waited.
C and K wanted to be in the delivery room, but requested to not watch the delivery. A curtain room divider was the ideal solution.
Baby M was delivered smoothly and without complication. She was immediately brought to her parents for skin on skin contact.

I never felt more powerful in my whole life. I felt strong. And useful. I felt uplifted.
And I felt joy and relief to realize that watching that child be delivered into the arms of already in love parents was not difficult at all. It felt exactly right. It felt like the strongest example of loving ones neighbour as oneself as I could imagine.

And I can hardly wait to do it again.”

The post Surro Saturday! – Rylan appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/surro-saturday-rylan/

Summer Recipes

I live in Edmonton, AB, Canada and it is our summertime. My background, is mennonite. I have such fond memories of growing up in a small (lets be real, tiny is more accurate) mennonite town! If there is one thing mennonites know about, its cooking. Cooking & baking. The food is so darn good. Its probably why my hips are rather voluptuous.

One of my favorite mennonite summer recipes is something called Rollkuchen. If you pronounce it in plain english, your saying it wrong. You have to roll the “R” and the “ch” makes a throaty cue sound. It is something that is typically eaten with Watermelon and since its Summer, Watermelon is a very popular meal in our home. Its cool, refreshing and packed with Vitamin C and Iron – both important for kids!  Its essentially a deep fried dough, nothing fancy. You eat the rollkuchen & watermelon together and it tastes absolutely divine.

If you feel inventive, some women stuff the rollkuchen with jams, fruits, chocolate sauce…kind of like making your own elephant ears at home. With leftover Rollkuchen, you can place them in a bag for overnight storing and toast them in the toaster the next morning. Slather them in PB&J and you’ve got yourself an awesome tasting slice of “toast”!

Another summer favorite of my family is a Balsamic Vinaigrette. My husband & kids love salad in the summer. Its both cool and refreshing and chock full of veggies. However, I’m quite picky about my dressings and frankly, finding a good balsamic vinaigrette is not easy. So I make my own! Its thick, tasty, not too sweet or tart and adds that pop of flavor into a greek salad or a simple house salad.

Today, I am sharing both of those recipes with you. I sincerely hope that if you try them, that they are as enjoyable for you and your family as they are to mine. <3

Rollkuchen
3 cups Flour
2 tsp Salt
1 tsp Baking Powder
*You will also need milk, egs, margarine & 1 liter oil (veggie, corn, canola..you pick).

Place oil into a large pot & heat up to 375F. Mix flour, salt & baking powder in a bowl. Add 6 tbsp melted margarine. Beat 2 eggs well and put them into a cup (a coffee mug is perfect). Fill the cup up with milk. Add the eggs/milk mixture into the flour. Mix well! Add flour until you reach the desired consistancy (not sticky, but not too firm either). Using a rolling pin, roll out into a thin layer of dough (about 1/8″ to 1/4″ thick). Cut into squares (4″x4″ is a good size). Place cut pieces into the hot oil, brown lightly on both sides. Remove & Enjoy! Some of them may puff up or remain flat.

Balsamic Vinaigrette
1/2 cup Oil (I use extra virgin olive oil)
1/4 cup Balsamic Vinegar
1 tsp honey (or corn syrup)
1 tsp Dijon, Honey OR Reg Mustard
1 tsp Onion Powder
1/2 tsp Garlic Powder
Salt & Pepper to taste (I use minimal salt and loads of pepper)

Mix all ingredients well and place in a jar/container for storage in the fridge. This vinaigrette usually takes quite a while to seperate. It also tends to be a bit on the thicker side. But super yummy!

The post Summer Recipes appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/summer-recipes/

Please Enjoy Some Funny Surro Memes

Today has been an off day in my house, and as such, my brain is drawing a blank on what todays post should be about. So please excuse my laziness today!   I hope you get a good laugh at some of these surrogacy/parenting memes.

The post Please Enjoy Some Funny Surro Memes appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/please-enjoy-funny-surro-memes/

Sand. So Much Sand.

Any parent who has experienced the joys (AKA: HELL) that is sand, will hopefully either benefit from my post or sit back in your chair, laughing at me. Either way, I hope it serves a purpose!

My own childhood is filled with fond memories of sand castles, building tracks for my cars to drive on, mud pies, lots of digging and playing with fun machines that were specific for sandboxes. I loved playing in the sand. I would spend hours upon hours unleashing my imagination, fully utilizing every sand particle within my reach!

Then I became a mom.

Sand went from being a heavenly sensory play material to my absolute worst nightmare!

My kids see sand think “WOOHOO! Sandcastles mom!” and suddenly, they are laying in the sand, full body, digging holes in the sand with their heads or, they do what my 3yo does and strips down to her pullup, lays down, covers herself in sand and throws it in the air. Cause thats a good idea.

Why do I hate this? Let me tell you. My kids are part Jamaican. My youngest daughter has that thick, curly, hair that mats easily. It is a graveyard for sand. Washing her hair after a day in sand takes FOREVER and we both hate the process. It usually ends in tears. Sometimes she cries too.

My oldest two? Oh yea, sand is great. Throwing it, burying themselves or friends, trying to do handstands in the sand, you name it. Sand finds its way into orifices it really shouldn’t make its home. They love every second and I begin to shake thinking of what my evening is going to entail and how I’m going to avoid getting sand all over my van (cause vehicle carpet is so damn easy to clean *NOT*) and sand in their car seats…cause thats comfortable. *eye roll*.

Having had way more sand experiences recently than I’d like to admit, I’ve learned a few things along the way. Here are a couple pro-tips. If you have more tips, I’d LOVE to hear them!!

TIPS
1. Buy a huge pack of water bottles from Costco for cheap. Then, before the kids get in the vehicle, use a bottle for each kid and wash them off gently. Including their feet!
2. Dust their clothes off (is this obvious? Yes…to you maybe. Apparently, It wasn’t to me. LOL). Or better yet, bring clean spare clothes and just change them before anyone gets in the vehicle.
3. Bring lots of safeway bags (with no holes) to shove everything with sand on it, into. This helps avoid sand all over the vehicle.
4. Once you come home from your outing, fill up the kiddie pool (if you have one) or turn on the sprinkler and let your kids run through. Its like a pre-wash before bath time. It does help reduce the amount of sand tracked through your house and left in your tub!
5. When washing your child’s hair in the shower, shampoo it as usual, condition it…then brush it!! Brush it while conditioner is in it!! Why? Because it straightens the hair all out easily and removes all the “traps” for the sand. When you rinse their hair, the sand comes out wayyy easier and much faster!
6. Keep one of those tiny brooms & dustpans in your vehicle during the summer. Brush all your equipment off before putting it all into your vehicle.
7. Just avoid going anywhere with sand. My best tip!

What are some things you do to avoid finding sand all over your house for weeks on end?

The post Sand. So Much Sand. appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/sand-much-sand/

Hormones, Heartburn & Hemorrhoids…OH MY!

Us surrogates & egg donors go through many discomforts that come along with pregnancy and having our ovaries bursting at the seams with eggs for retrieval. 24 eggs, the egg donors dozen!

While we love being surrogates & egg donors, don’t kid yourself, we have had our own (sometimes hilarious) experiences with it. Please enjoy some of the confessions that surrogates and egg donors have been so sweet to share with me. I laughed pretty hard at some of these, I hope you get as much entertainment from them as I did.

 

“I became a surrogate because I was unfulfilled by the lack of excitement from my own partner over our natural children. I wanted to vicariously live through people who would be thrilled about the baby I was carrying for them.”

“every time I need to pee I think ‘ I should have bought more tests!”

“I boiled a crochet hook to sterilize it and used sterile gloves I had acquired from a hosp to try and break my own water. I could reach my cervix with my hand, but I just couldn’t get the hook anywhere near where it needed to be. Needless to say, it didn’t work!”

“I’m excited to not to have to stay up nursing a newborn and listening to my IPs tell me how tiring their first days as new parents are”

“after big meals I look in the mirror and stick my ‘food baby’ out and look at my husband and say ‘I MUST be pregnant! Look at this stomach’. He kindly reminds me that there’s no way a little embryo would be the size of my supper that night… men “

“I enjoy pregnancy, labour and birth but I don’t want anymore of my own children. I found a pretty cool way to satisfy this desire.”

“During my surrogate pregnancy, my farts got so bad that some nights, my husband slept with an actual gas mask on. According to him it was the only solution for survival.”

“The best thing about surrogacy is helping grow/make a family and watching these people become parents. I never understood why I enjoyed being pregnant until I became a surrogate!“

“While going through screening I logically knew nothing should come up, I was worried results would show something I was unaware of.”

“There were days near the end where I skipped my PIO because I just couldn’t take the thought of another.“

“Traveling for transfer was suppose to be a break from my kids. Instead I ended up bringing them with me”

“Those pregnancy hormones do a lot of things to you. MAke you feel up and down. For me, OMG my sex drive was CRAZZZYYY. I felt I could not get enough of sex and foreplay and was always horny.“

“I spent nearly $300 trying to induce labor. I was done.“

“My surrogacy journey was the only time I was excited to have morning sickness and constipation.”

“I wish I could have breastfed in the hospital to kick start my milk production. Exclusively pumping is hard and maintaining a supply without a baby is even more difficult.“

“My siblings and in laws don’t know I was a surrogate“

“Never thought I would gain friends from this experience that would become like family.“

“I feared going for my ultrasound recently. I knew they shouldn’t find a baby already on ultrasound but I had been sexually active. I mean I knew I shouldn’t be pregnant but WHAT IF. NOW, I’m stressing. Like am I the only one who fears ultrasounds and all the things they COULD find. What if…”

“My husbands favorite thing was to tell everyone that his wife was knocked up…and it wasn’t his. Then he would sit & watch their reactions. For fun.”

“I felt the IF wasn’t onboard with the whole journey and that the IM forced him through everything and even the week the baby was born he didn’t fly in until 2 days before the scheduled c section and the IM was here for a week and a half. She was excited but she tried to “cheap” out on everything“

“Having to fly to another province for the transfer was a mini vacation for me. I visited friends, went sight-seeing, and ordered room service at the hotel. It was a nice break from my kids.“

“I never had hemorrhoids with my own kids, however, I had mild ones after the 1st journey and mild to medium with 2nd journey. I had no clue how to handle this.”

“I stole the hook [for breaking the water] from the maternity ward but couldn’t get to through the cervix!”

“When I signed up to be a surrogate I thought it would be easy with no issues. It turned out be harder on my body than I thought it would be.”

 

The post Hormones, Heartburn & Hemorrhoids…OH MY! appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/hormones-heartburn-hemorrhoids-oh/

Guest Post – Surrogate Jennifer

This is a guest post from of the Surrogates with ANU. Her name is Jennifer and she just had her surro-baby recently. Please enjoy!

 

“When our youngest was a couple of years old, my husband and I had the talk about whether we were done building our family.  With having 3 kids and our youngest having a fatal genetic disease, we decided that our family is complete.  As many women do though, I still had the urge to be pregnant again.

Surrogacy has always been in the back of my mind, especially after watching a friend be a surrogate 3 times.  I hadn’t really researched it other than asking her questions and doing a quick Google search though.  I met Lorraine at a local tradeshow and decided that it was an opportune time to get more information.  We talked for a short while and Lorraine agreed to send me an information package.  I awaited that email eagerly.  It didn’t take long for it to come in and I read the whole information package in one sitting.  I did have a few more questions but once they were answered, I decided that this was something I would like to try.  Why not “scratch the itch” for me wanting to be pregnant while helping someone in need?

Unfortunately, when I approached my husband with the idea, he instantly said no.  He wasn’t interested in learning more about it and he just wasn’t comfortable with the idea of me being a surrogate.  Surrogacy would just not leave my mind though so a few weeks later I asked my husband if he would be willing to at least read the information package so we could discuss this further.  He agreed.  I sat beside him on the couch while he read through the booklet.  He looked at me and said he still wasn’t comfortable with it.  The idea of me being pregnant with someone else’s child was very strange for him and he was obviously concerned about the risks associated with the medications and the pregnancy.  We spent a couple of hours talking through his concerns and he finally looked at me and asked if this is something that I’d really like to do.  I told him it was so he agreed to support me in this journey.  He also said that if it stops me from bugging him to have more babies of our own, then it might be a good idea!  Typical man thought, hey?

So, we started the process.  December 2015, I had my profile completed and sent off to the ladies at ANU.  Within a week or two, Lorraine told me that she had a wonderful couple in mind for me and I met with V & N over the telephone shortly after that.  To say it was an easy conversation was an understatement.  I mean, “so can I have your baby?” is not a good conversation starter.  Luckily Lorraine was on the call with us to help keep the conversation going and to help answer questions for the both of us.  We agreed to work together and I met with V & N over Skype shortly after that as well.

Within the next couple of months my husband and I went through all of the screening process.  There was bloodwork to be done by both of us and all of my medical history had to be sent to the fertility clinic.  My husband and I also attended a counselling session with the fertility clinic over Skype.  This was an easy appointment and the counsellor just wanted to make sure we understood what we were getting into and that I had support to go through this journey.  In February 2016 I began a dummy cycle to see how my body would react to the medication that is needed in a surrogacy.  My body reacted great to the medication but unfortunately, they found an ovarian cyst during the ultrasound that they wanted to have removed before we went forward with the surrogacy.

This was just a bump in the road of our journey though and surgery went well.  I was cleared to proceed with the surrogacy in the fall of 2016.  I started meds and we set the date!  At the end of October 2016, I flew to BC to go for my transfer.  I was so nervous.  As I was sitting in the waiting room before the procedure, my mind was racing.  Am I making the right decision to be a surrogate?  Is this something I really want to do?  Is this procedure going to hurt?  What if it doesn’t work?  What if I can’t handle being a surrogate?  They called me in.  Even with all of my anxiety creeping up, I knew I needed to just go through with it.  The transfer didn’t hurt at all and the staff were all wonderful.  They made me feel much more at ease and we were done within minutes.  After some relaxation and further instructions, I went and had lunch with a friend and went back to my hotel room for the night.  I flew home the next day and had to “patiently” wait 2 weeks until I was sent for bloodwork to confirm the pregnancy.

I had no symptoms.  I didn’t feel pregnant.  I also wasn’t patient and decided to take a home pregnancy test around a week later.  That little red line was barely visible but it was there!  I was so excited but didn’t want to tell my IPs yet, just in case.  I peed on that stick every day and was so happy to see it darken.  I went for my 2 week bloodwork and just as I had expected, it came back showing that I was pregnant.  My IPs were ecstatic but I had to wait until the next set of bloodwork 2 days later for an official pregnancy announcement.  It came back showing that I was indeed pregnant and we could plan for this pregnancy.  My IPs were excited but I could tell they were nervous.  I knew that until they held that baby in their arms, there always would be that “what if”.

The pregnancy went ahead uncomplicated.  The first trimester was a little rough on me because of the medication.  It wasn’t as bad as many women have it though but I just found that I couldn’t eat what I usually did and craved lots of fruits and veggies.  It all calmed down once I was done all of the medications in the second trimester.  Throughout this whole time I always spoke to my IPs at least once a week, sometimes more.  I always wanted to keep them updated on how I was doing and how baby was moving (once I felt him).  Unfortunately, due to the distance of my IPs, they weren’t able to attend any of the prenatal appointments or ultrasounds but I always sent them pictures and updates after every appointment.  However, we were able to Skype the gender reveal ultrasound and they got to find out live that they were having a little boy!  They told me that doing that made it more real for them.  I couldn’t imagine how they must have felt, letting a complete stranger grow their child in a completely different country.  They had many questions throughout the pregnancy and I tried to reassure them as much as I could.

As we entered the third trimester, it was time to start planning my IPs arrival in Canada.  Obviously this was all for them to do but it was exciting.  After so long, we were finally getting to this point in the journey.  Months turned to weeks.  Weeks turned into days.  I got the message that they were about to board the plane to Canada.  I was excited but I was even more nervous.  I was finally going to meet these people that I have been talking to for over a year but what was I going to say to them?  Should I hug them?  How should I act around them?  They arrived quite late so we met the next day.  It all came so natural when I met them.  We hugged and I tried not to cry.  There were a few awkward silences but overall we had plenty to talk about.  We spent all afternoon together and made plans to meet up again once they were fully settled and had gotten some sleep.  Their son had different plans though…

The very next day I started having cramps.  Not abnormal as I had them the whole week before my youngest daughter was born so I figured it meant he was coming soon.  By dinner time, those cramps had turned into contractions and I began to monitor them.  They went on all night.  By 2 am they were 10 minutes apart but I didn’t want to start waking people up until they were below 10 minutes so I waited.  I’m glad I did because they went back up to about 20 minutes apart and stayed that way all morning.  At least everyone else could get some sleep.  At about 4 am, I sent my IPs a message letting them know I was having contractions but it was not time to go to the hospital.  My IF responded, which I later learned he was actually having trouble sleeping that night because he just had a feeling something was going to happen that night, and I kept them in the loop until I decided it was time to go to the hospital at around 9 am.

My midwife checked me shortly after we all arrived at the hospital and I was 7 cm dilated.  She let me labour as I wanted and was there for me when I decided it was time to push.  Both of my IPs stayed in the room while I pushed; my IF sat back to give me some privacy but my IM sat beside me and held my hand.  Shortly after lunch, Baby L was born healthy and crying.  His mom got to watch as he was born and cut his cord.

Watching my IPs hold their brand new baby boy was the most amazing feeling.  The joy in their eyes and the smiles on their faces is exactly why I did this.  I’m blessed that they chose me to be a part of their journey and I’m excited to have made lifelong friends with these amazing people.”

The post Guest Post – Surrogate Jennifer appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/guest-post-surrogate-jennifer/

Surrogacy in the News

I recently came across an article about a woman who was in a motor vehicle collision. The injuries she sustained left her unable to bear children. Those facts in and of themselves, may not be all that fascinating. What is fascinating, is that she was awarded a large sum of money and included in that sum was $100,000 for surrogacy!

This is a huge first in Canada and, imo, a big win for surrogacy! The need for surrogacy was validated in that decision.

Canada is the land of freedom and I am stoked to hear that the courts gave her the freedom to choose how she will get to have her own biological children one day.

 

*Read the article!*

 

The post Surrogacy in the News appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/surrogacy-in-the-news/

Why Using an Agency for Surrogacy is Important and How to Choose One.

You’ve found ANU’s website and your interested in becoming an egg donor, a surrogate or maybe your an intended parent and on the prowl for a surrogate and/or egg donor but your not sure how to get started. Well, you’ve come to the right place! My first suggestion is to contact an agency. But…how do you pick one? This article is here to help you with that!

Choosing to use an agency is so important, no matter your role, and below are questions that may be worthwhile asking the agency your interested in hiring.

Why use an agency?
An agency plays such a critical role for all parties involved. As a surrogate, in my experience, having a third party to guide me through the process was priceless.

• A reputable agency screens all parties involved. Whether its a surrogate, egg donor or intended parent(s).
• Agencies also have lawyers on board to help navigate the maze of legal matters that come along with the adventure that is Surrogacy.
• Typically, fertility clinic appointments are coordinated by the agency. This reduces stress and confusion in the process.
• Agencies also provide information, education & support during the entire surrogacy journey for all parties involved.

 

What are some questions I should ask before hiring an agency?
It is critical that you feel 100% comfortable with the agency representing you. There are so many personal topics & issues that can come up with surrogacy and you want to ensure that the support and assistance will be there, if and when, it is needed. Here are are just a few questions to consider depending on your need of the agency:

 

As a Surrogate

1. What is the criteria for being a surrogate? What are some of the disqualifications?
2. What screenings are done? Are they done for only myself or my spouse/partner too?
3. How long does it typically take to get paired with a set of Intended Parents?
4. Can I choose who I get paired with? Or are they selected for me?
5. How supported do you feel? Do you have a good vibe with the agency?
6. Do I have to hire my own lawyer to represent my surrogacy or is one provided?

 

As an Egg Donor

1. What are the requirements to be an egg donor?
2. What screenings must I go through?
3. What is the egg donation process like?
4. Do I remain anonymous or will I know who uses my eggs?
5. What risks are involved with egg donation?

 

As an Intended Parent

1. How are surrogates/egg donors found?
2. Are surrogates/egg donors screened? What screenings are completed?
3. What are some expenses I/we might encounter during this process?
4. What are the financial obligations? What is the payment schedule?
5. Does the agency do gestational and/or traditional surrogacy?
6. What clinics does the agency work with? What cities are those clinics in?
7. How many successful families are grown a year through the agency?
8. Can we be present at the birth of our baby(ies)?

 

To be clear, my list of questions is by no means complete. There are many more you may have of your own that I haven’t listed. Whatever the case, no matter how many questions you have I hope the lists I posted get you started in the right direction of finding an agency that will help you through your journey!

The post Why Using an Agency for Surrogacy is Important and How to Choose One. appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/using-agency-surrogacy-important-choose-one/

Go Surro’s Go!

The past two weeks have been busy at ANU! We’ve had 4, yes FOUR, transfers for 4 different surrogates!

Do you know what that means? It means that there is hope for four families. It means that there are four families sitting on pins & needles, waiting anxiously to see if they will be having the baby they have longed for with all their beings. All the heartache, waiting, disappointment in their past could change in an instant. Isn’t that incredible?

You might be thinking “why on earth is this woman so excited over someone else being pregnant?” The reason I am so excited about the craziness of the past two weeks is because I know the excitement of being pregnant (for myself or my intended parents). I know the earth shattering anxiety that comes with waiting for a positive pregnancy test. I know the sadness that comes with a negative pregnancy test, and another negative…anddddd yet another negative test. I know the absolute heartache that comes with a chemical pregnancy. All that, all my experiences are nothing compared to what some intended parents have gone through. Some of the struggles I’ve heard about are ones that I wish I could erase for them. Everything from failed IVF procedures, lost pregnancies, still births and even the premature inability to carry a baby. Other couples struggles lay in the range of biology – especially for same sex couples. No matter the struggle, infertility is a tough experience.

I’m also excited because we have four amazing ladies in the midst of their journey to grow families. To me, even the hope of growing a family is something to be celebrated! Its their chance – the chance they [intended parents] have prayed for, longed for and patiently waited for.

Surrogacy is magical! From meeting intended parents to handing a newly born babe into their arms, there is nothing compared to the absolute fulfillment that surrogacy brings to families. Surrogates and intended parents alike.

The post Go Surro’s Go! appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/go-surros-go/

Just So You Know…

Certain plastic items do not show up on x-rays.

A friend in ANU has been encouraging me to post my story about my toddler, lego’s & x-rays.

I’m sure you have one too. The toddler who sees a fry on the floor of McDonalds that’s been there for the last 6 months and instantly thinks “OMG, That is the tastiest looking fry ever. I must eat it. Now.” and before you can reach them, its already in their stomachs and they are fully satisfied that they not only got to eat this (obviously) highly nutritious snack…but they managed to do it faster than your supermom wings could stop them.

That toddler. I’m talking about that one.

I have one. She’s adorable as heck. In pictures of her as a newborn, people ask me if I’m holding a doll or a human. She’s got more sass than all three Golden Girls put together and the confidence to back it up! However, she’s my tiny one. She’s newly 3 and close to 28ish lbs. I often confess to people who are unfamiliar with her and stare at me in shock when she takes on the biggest kid in the playground…think of her as the chihuahua in a park of St. Bernards. FULL of personality and she does not care if you are 50 years old or 1 yr old, she’ll give you a piece of her mind! Its quite adorable actually. I love that about her, I love that she is a confident, butt-kicking, sassy little girl. It will serve her well eventually.

But…

It does not serve her (or me) well when we are having an argument about why we don’t put lego in our mouths. She digs in those stubborn heels, throws on her smile that melts hearts and says “but mom, I’m just gonna look at it! I won’t put it in my mouth. Promise.”

Uh huh.

*moments later*

“Mom…can I play outsthide?”
“Whats in your mouth??”
“Nothing”
“Uh huh. Spit it out.”
Ppppbbbthhhh.

Now I’ve got slobbered covered lego in my hands. Goody.

“MOOOOOMMMMM!!!”
“What?”
“Theres a lego in my tummy!”
“What?! What do you mean its in your tummy?”
“I put it in my mouth, and it went down my throat into my tummy and its going into my toes!”
“Seriously?”
“Mom, its in my toes!!”

Ok kiddo, its not in your toes, but I’m happy that’s your biggest concern. My concern is slightly different though. I have no idea what piece she swallowed. Ever tried asking a 3yo to describe a piece of lego? Its kind of like asking a cat to roll over. They’ll do everything BUT roll over. Well, I got all kinds of descriptions, none that even came close to lego. Off to the ER we go for x-rays. After all, I can’t say the thought of a large piece of lego ripping through my intestines sounds fun , let alone her intestines, and its better to be safe than sorry, right?

Right. Or wrong. Plastic, as we so learned, does not show up on x-rays. Its also a lot more common than you’d think apparently. (At least I’m not the only parent hauling their children into the ER, completely embarrassed to admit their mine.)

The Dr said the piece of lego would pass in about a week and I could “dig around” to find it. I stared at her. Then I began to laugh uncontrollably. If she thinks I’m gonna dig through toddler poo for a piece of lego, she’s got another thing comin’! I responded that if I wanted it badly enough, I’d send a letter to Lego themselves explaining the story asking for a replacement piece. I’m sure they’d be fairly understanding in such dirty matters.

Lesson learned, the lego has all been put away until she stops putting things in her mouth, so I’m thinking another 15 years should do it.

 

The post Just So You Know… appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/just-so-you-know/

Guest Post – Samantha, Surrogate

I’ve asked a fellow surrogate to share her journey with us. She has generously accepted and wrote up this piece about how she helped build a family for someone else.

 

“Hi there,
Heres my story : I’m Samantha, 27 years old
My Husband (Alan, 39 years old) and I have one very healthy and perfect daughter Adaline. She is the apple to our eye! Our whole world!!!

I literally LOVE being pregnant like seriously Loooovvvee it. There’s something about growing a human being that I love. Even if it isn’t mine. Adaline wasn’t a ” planned pregnancy ” but the biggest and best surprise we could ever ask for!  After Adaline was born I missed being pregnant, I asked Alan if he was ready for another (like not even two months in) He thought I was nuts! Three months later I was at baby event and I saw an old friend volunteering for a surrogate group. We chatted about surrogacy, I was hooked. Alan and I chatted about it later that day. We looked into it. This was for us! We liked to help out people, I love being pregnant! Where do I sign

We did all the paper work and blood test etc by the end of November. I was paired on Dec 26 2015. Adaline was only 6 months at the time. I fell in love with my IPS (C & P) right off the bat! They are the sweetest couple! Always asking about our life, how Adaline is doing etc. My family wasn’t overly supportive, my mom said ” why can’t you do something normal like giving blood ” my husband was so supportive, his family didn’t completely understand. Even though I explained everything over a dozen times. Not my egg, not Alans sperm not our baby.

Everything moved pretty fast I think after being paired in December 2015. We did a transfer June 24 16 and it stuck!! I was pregnant whoot whoot. Did I mention we sold our home and moved the day after the transfer! Hahahah! It was very busy and stressful. I didn’t have to lift or touch anything. It was very nice. The pregnancy went pretty fast and fairly easy. Still sick multiple times a day buttt I was growing a human being, this is a miracle!

When C & P’s baby moved inside me I thought about my IPs , how their  lives were about to change.
When I was pregnant with Adaline and she was moving inside me I thought about how much I love my child.
I gave birth to my C & P’s baby March 19 2017. After two long days of labor she was finally here! 8.10 oz (same weight at birth as Adaline). IPS are so in love and grateful. I’m so happy for them. They are the best parents a child could ask for.

Life after my surrogacy journey, it’s amazing honestly BEST decision I’ve ever made (other then Alan and Adaline of course). My IPS baby is just over three months talking up a storm, healthy and beautiful!! IPS are over the moon. I’m forever grateful I got this amazing experience! It made me so humble and grateful not only to carry a child for an other couple but my own! Two very healthy and perfect children. My C & P have asked me to carry again! Hopefully I’ll be pregnant again in two months and  After my third pregnancy Alan and I will try and for our second child.”

 

*Posted with permission from the intended parents

 

*posted with permission from Samantha & the baby’s parents.

The post Guest Post – Samantha, Surrogate appeared first on ANU Fertility Consultants.

source http://www.surrogacyincanada.com/guest-post-samantha-surrogate/